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When Guns Are Outlawed Only Outlaws Will have Stink Finger

A Montgomery man was jailed Saturday accused of exposing himself outside the Alabama State Capitol building and throwing punches at a state trooper, according to court records.  Oh , it gets better..


Julian David Murphy, 60, was charged with disorderly conduct and public lewdness after the incident about 8 a.m.

According to an arrest affidavit written by the state trooper, Murphy approached the law enforcement official’s vehicle while the state trooper was parked on the South Union Street side near the gift shop. 

Julian Murphy was charged with public lewdness and disorderly conduct after he allegedly exposed himself and threw punches at a state trooper outside the state capitol.

Julian Murphy was charged with public lewdness and disorderly conduct after he allegedly exposed himself and threw punches at a state trooper outside the state capitol. (Photo: MCSO)

“The subject was talking out of his head and saying things that did not make sense,” the state trooper wrote. 

“I exited my vehicle and asked the subject to move on,” the trooper wrote.

 

“At that time the subject gave me a thousand-yard stare and then took a swing at me,” the law enforcement official wrote.

Things take a turn for the surreal from there.

The trooper blocked his swing and backed away, he wrote.

Murphy then “dropped his pants with his back to me, put his finger in his rectum and then came at me swinging,” the state trooper wrote. 

Well. You don’t hear that every day. I wonder if he left one finger stuck in his butthole and went wildly flailing with his other hand. How can I sleep at night not knowing?!

“I removed my Taser and tased the subject one time. The subject then fell to the ground,” the state trooper wrote in court records.  what a day he had !

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